There’s this kid in the office who spends a lot of time trying to bug me. Any way he can make fun of english or white people or my accent or my hair, it’s all free game, lets try to get under dave’s skin.

I resist. I smile and laugh. Always.

But the other day, I fought back.

He walked over and asked me to connect the internet, throwing in one or two of the spanishly-butchered english words and a slimy “yyYYYYeeeaahh.”

But I interrupted. I softly put my hand on his belly. He stopped talking. I took my hand off and he kept talking, so I put my hand on his belly again, more firmly (but still softly).

He stopped talking and sputtered some bad words in spanish.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, this day I won.